Shade's Pranks

The webmaster herself wrote this one; she's done most of this stuff before

1. Go to a hotel and ask if the stairs are available. This seems normal, but  most of the time the reception will look at you like you asked "where's the shitbath?"

2. Pack a white dress shirt, a black blazer, a pair of black pants (I do leggings, but you can do slacks if leggings aren't your thing), a black necktie, and a pair of sunglasses. Change into this outfit randomly in the middle of the day, and come back to class interrogating your classmates. 30 minutes later (or once the novelty is gone), change back into your regular clothes and when asked about why you randomly changed into a suit for half the period, act confused and say you don't remember doing that, or that half of the period had already passed.

(optionally, you can also wear combat boots that day; it makes the outfit look cooler)

3. Act normal, but then start spasming and convulsing, and pretend to pass out. If someone tries to call an ambulance, wake up, grab a banana or another random object near you (e.g a perfume bottle or file organizer) and try to rob the building you're in of all its air

4. Bring a plushie with you everywhere. Insist that they're your child if asked about them. Try to get them their own seats at restaurants as well. On a vacation a few years ago, my family went to a restaurant called Mama's Farmhouse, and I got a highchair for the plushies. They decided to share my meal of fried chicken, corn and mac n cheese

5. Go on a street and give a homeless man a pickaxe. Tell him that there's gold under the nearest railroad track

1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.

2) Groan out loud in the bathroom cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the bathroom at the time).

3) Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.

4) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye".

5) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your ears and grimace.

6) Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say,"Sorry, I really prefer it this way".

7) Walk sideways to the photocopier.

8) While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

9) Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers.

10) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".

11) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).

12) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).

13) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

14) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).

15) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.

16) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob".

17) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two".

18) After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent. As in "the report is on your desk, mon". Keep this up for one hour.

19) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the elevator.

20) In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!".

21) At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce "As God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again".

22) In a colleagues diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".

23) Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask "You wanna trade?".

24) Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person:"Do you hear that?" "What?""Never mind, it's gone now".

25) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".

26) Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.

27) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.

28) Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.

29) Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.

How To Get Banned From Walmart

Another brilliant list from the mind of Shade A

1. Set off the alarms to go off in ten minute intervals

2. Start playing football, soccer or some other sport. Try to get as many people to join in as possible.

3. Dart around suspiciously while humming the Mission Impossible theme

4. Whenever the intercom voice comes on, curl up into a fetal position and scream "THE VOICES ARE BACK!"

5. Call a code black. All the employees will gather at the center of the store, leaving anyone free to loot and wreck the store

5. If you're an older person, walk...as...slowly...as...possible

6. This one is great for any clothing store or Goodwill as well; hide in the clothing racks shouting "Pick me! I'm on sale!"

7. Storm out of the dressing room and angrily ask an employee "why isn't there any toilet paper in that stall?"

8. Ask them to print out an anti-WalMart picture (such as tshirthell's Wal-Marx design)

9. Dress up as a lion and stand outside the hardware department saying "Welcome to Narnia!"

10. Blockade an entire toy isle and stage an epic fight between GI Joes and X-Men. Take bets on who will win. This is better with friend around. I did this when I was younger at the local Family Dollar, except with Barbie dolls.

11. Pretend to be a cashier at an empty checkout stand

12. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

13. Call a code Adam. Quick warning, you will be locked inside of the wal-mart while security searches for a nonexistent child, so don't do this if you have any plans for the day.

14. Set up a tent in the camping isle, and have a sleepover

15. Open up a sleeping bag, crawl inside, and take a nap.

16.Go to a different, non-WalMart store, buy something from there that WalMart does NOT have, go to WalMart, and try to make the WalMart employees ring it up.

17. Challenge other shoppers to a duel with giftwrap tubes or other similarly shaped objects.

18. Buy bags of frozen ice, wait a few hours, and then try to check out

19. Buy a lot of items and go to a "20 items or less" checkout

20. Hold a pillow fight in the bedding aisle.

21. Put condoms and pregnancy tests in unattended carts

22. Scream "The brits are coming!" while running around in a frenzy

23. Call customer service while you're on your phone in the store. Find the employee you're talking to and show them your phone.

24. Find a wall telephone. Dial #96. This gets you the intercom; you know what to do.

25. Ask if you can test the condoms before buying them.

26. Cry and ask "Why wont you leave me alone?' if an employee tries to talk to you

27. If you're near someone with really bad bre4ath, do them a favor and throw some toothpaste in their cart.

28. While in any department, yell "Who even buys this crap anyways?"

29.  Set all the computers to a website of your choosing while nobody is looking.

30. Grab as many gift cards as you can, and use a credit card that does not work to fill them. Get angry at the cashier and ask to see the manager, telling them that they're doing it wrong